It would make parenting so much easier if they gave an instruction manual on your way home from the hospital. Unfortunately, this is the epitome of learning “on the job” and there are lots of times where you may feel like you’re screwing up.
No matter how frustrated you may get, it’s very important to keep your emotions in check and not let your kids see you doing certain things when you get upset.
Here are three things in particular that I’ve stopped doing to my kids when I’m upset and, trust me, it’s made a huge difference in our family life.
1. Yelling at them
As a result of lack of sleep and dealing with two little ones, it became way too easy to get upset letting my temper flair and start yelling. Unfortunately, this usually just adds fuel to the fire of the situation.
With younger kids, they can either just tune you out, or become legitimately terrified of your temper. With older kids and teens, they’re more likely to start yelling back which then starts a back-and-forth escalation that isn’t going to do anyone any good.
Once in a while, I will slip and raise my voice a little too loud and my kids will say to me “why are you yelling mom?”. There’s nothing like having your kid to remind you of your no yelling rule.
2. Disciplining in the moment
It’s natural for you to get angry with your children and fly off the handle when you’re disciplining them. But, once you make a proclamation, such as “You are grounded for a month,” then you’ve set the tone for how this is going to play out.
You can’t go back and realize that maybe a month is too long and then let them off the hook later on. When you do that, they take your discipline less seriously and are more likely to get in trouble again because they figure you will just back down.
Instead, tell them that you will discuss their behavior later when you’ve calmed down. Then, you can come back to have a rational conversation about their behavior. This will help them when it comes to modifying their actions and it will keep your blood pressure from blowing up!
3. Sending them to time out
Time outs became really popular a decade ago or so, but let’s face it, they’re just not cutting it in a lot of situations. Instead, if your child is throwing a tantrum, tell them they cannot do whatever it was that they were doing until they’ve calmed down.
If they blow-up while playing a game, tell them that the game gets put away until they stop having a meltdown. This will usually fix the situation and you can then address things later when you’ve both calmed down.
If they continue, ignore them. The tantrum is meant to be an acting out that will get attention. If you don’t feed into this, then it’s like denying oxygen to a fire. It will go out on its own pretty quickly.
Staying calm when you are upset with your children can be a difficult thing. But you can’t let your temper flare out of control. Remember, you are modeling behavior that will fuel their actions for years to come. Instead, take a deep breath and try to handle things calmly and rationally.
If you’re like me, then you probably like to limit screen time for your kids. Spending time with your kids can be a healthy activity getting everyone off the couch and active outdoors. If your children know that you value activity, they’re more likely to value it themselves.
Here’s a couple fun outdoor activities that our family likes and can get your whole family spending an active time together:
Sidewalk art
This is a simple one when you don’t want to spend a lot of time preparing or having to do a lot of serious physical activity. Keep a supply of sidewalk chalk in your supply closet!
Let your child’s inner artist come out and when the rain washes it away you can start all over. If you really want to get jumping, sketch out a hopscotch grid and go to town.
Biking
Our family enjoys biking our neighborhood trail whenever we get the chance. It brings a calm to our hectic schedules. Sometimes if time and weather permit, we’ll go to the beach and ride our bikes along the trails there. I realize not everyone lives close to the beach but it can be fun riding along a canal or other body of water in your city!
Here are a few ideas that we haven’t tried ourselves but look really fun. We are adding them to our list and hope to do them really soon!
Geocaching
This is a great activity that’s been going on since 2000. Currently, there are millions of geocaches hidden around the world.
You can download the app and then follow your GPS on an outdoor adventure to locate this “hidden treasure.” Once you find it, you sign the log and know that you’ve accomplished something and had a chance to bond along the way.
And some of the caches even contain tiny prizes inside of them. Find out more about this at the Official Geocaching Website.
Farmer’s Markets
Many local communities have weekend farmer’s markets. You can walk around outdoors and check out the incredible produce the local farmers have to offer. It’s a good way to introduce your kids to fresh fruits and veggies and instill in them a belief in supporting local businesses and independent growers.
Disc Golf
This one caught on with college students years ago, but it’s one that the whole family can really enjoy. Some people buy all kinds of frisbees to play with, but you really only need a few that you can pick up at the dollar store. You can even make your own “course” in your backyard by designating a goal and having everyone see who can get the closest to it with their frisbee.
That’s just a few things you can do to get your kids moving and involved in the outdoors. Sure, they may complain about bug bites, the heat, or a few cuts and scrapes along the way, but those can be taken care of easily and everyone will enjoy spending time together.
As moms, it’s our responsibility to instill healthy habits in our children. This includes getting physically active. A popular option is to get our kids playing sports.
Here are some of the best fun sports snacks that are also healthy for your child.
Fruit
This is always a healthy option for your kids. You may need to get creative with your choices and you definitely want to offer some variety.
Here’s some of the best options:
Orange slices — If your child is old enough to peel their own, then you can upgrade to clementines.
Apple slices — Just skip the high sugar caramel dips.
Applesauce squeezers — This is a great choice for families on the go.
Bananas — This is a great source of potassium that can be lost as you exercise leading to muscle cramps and spasms.
Raisins — There’s a reason this is called nature’s candy. A box of raisins is a quick hand-held snack to take with you.
Yogurt — Fruit flavored yogurt tubes are another portable healthy snack.
Melons – Cut up honeydew and cantaloupe are refreshing options.
Proteins
Protein snacks have become big lately in the stores. For adults, protein bars and shakes are good on-the-go snacks. But these aren’t really appropriate for kids. (Not to mention they’re usually full of artificial ingredients.)
Here are a few natural protein alternatives:
Cheese sticks—Kids love string cheese, but if you’re worried about fat content, opt for the 2% cheese instead.
Turkey and Chicken—Roll a slice of turkey or chicken around a cheese stick and you have the protein benefits of a sandwich without the carbs.
Salami sticks—You may have seen these at parties as an hors d’oeuvres. They are sticks of mozzarella wrapped in a piece of salami. You can now buy these in 2-packs for a quick snack.
Protein packs—Many companies are now selling “Lunchable” style protein snacks with cheese squares, meat, and nuts.
Peanut Butter—If your child doesn’t have a peanut allergy, this can be put on celery for a quick and healthy snack option.
Water
One of the biggest tips I can give is to stay hydrated as much as possible. Give your child his or her own water bottle to fill and refill as they need it. Plain water is a healthy option that will keep them going. Don’t give sugary sodas or juices. Sports drinks in moderation for those days they’ve been playing all day in the heat to get an extra boost in between games.
Healthy Snacks Keeps Your Kids Prepared with Fuel for the Playing Field
Part of any athletic regimen is taking care of yourself so that you can perform on the court or field. By giving your kids these healthy snack options, you’ll give them that boost to keep playing their best.
Parents instinctively know that sports are good for kids. It’s obvious the exercise, social interactions and discipline taught will all benefit our kids.
Our children observed lots of different sports and determined which sports they were most interested in.
I took our kids to Gymboree classes where they interacted with other kids and enjoyed hands on play, music and singing.
4 to 5 Year Old’s
Now they can start to have a little more structure in their physical activity. Consider signing them up for team sports like T-ball and basketball. (Obviously, the basketball is going to have to be modified so they can reach the basket.)
Some hard core golf players have their kids start playing golf at this age. Miniature golf is fun for the kids!
Pay special attention to how the coaches handle these kids. At this age, it’s about learning the rules of the game and how to play without too much of a competitive edge. Avoid heavy contact sports and consider something like football if it is no-touch, flag football.
6 to 9 Year Old’s
Once a child is regularly starting school, their ability to concentrate and focus for an extended period of time should be increasing.
Their physical maturity with hand-eye coordination and vision should be more acute. This is the time for more team sports such as football, soccer, softball, and baseball but it’s also a good time for athletic classes.
Two good recommendations that stress flexibility and motor skills are gymnastics and martial arts. And, if you haven’t already taught your child to swim, now’s the time. If they excel at this, you may want to consider signing them up for a swim team.
10 Year Old’s to Teens
At this age, your child may have gotten a taste for different sports and found one that they really like.
Their bodies are more resilient, so you can consider contact sports at a more competitive level such as football, hockey, soccer and lacrosse as well as those which focus more on hand-eye coordination such as basketball, baseball/softball, and volleyball.
If your child prefers solo sports, the teen years is a perfect time to continue with, or sign up for events such as gymnastics, skating, martial arts, archery, swimming/diving, or track.
Know There Will Be Cuts and Scrapes
Just be forewarned they’re going to get cuts and scrapes along the way. This is just a function of being a kid and being active. Make sure the league or school they’re playing for has a concussion protocol that they follow for more serious injuries.
The important thing is to talk to your child and find out what they’re interested in.
Before having kids, I’d always heard of people talking about soccer moms—those harried suburban women with a mini-van full of kids having to run back and forth transporting them from practices to games.
I wasn’t sure that would ever by me. But now, after having kids of my own, I’m not a soccer mom. Instead, I’m a softball mom and, at one point, when my son was playing, also a baseball mom.
Peak season in the springtime usually meant practice and/or games 2-3 days a week. That was busy enough but when you pull in games on the weekends, you can see your life getting chaotic and out of control.
So, on any given day, you have to pick up the kids from school, have them scarf down a quick snack, start on their homework, go to practice, get back home, cook them dinner, feed them, and then they have to shower, finish their homework and maybe, just maybe, you can get them to bed at a decent hour.
So, how do we help our children do all of this? The first thing you’re going to need is a giant calendar.
I know, apps work well, too. But for a lot of people, having a big physical calendar is still the best way to go so you can physically see it without opening your phone and going down the rabbit-hole of technology distractions.
List all the events you have as soon as you get the schedule. Put up the practice dates, games, and other school events and see if there’s going to be any time left for other events. You don’t want to over schedule yourself and burn out even more!
Include one very specific thing for you and your family—some quality family time.
Make sure that at least once a week you’re taking a break from all the insanity and spending time without any sports. Watch a movie. Have a quiet dinner together. Do whatever you can but enjoy yourself with your kids.
And lastly, remember that the crockpot can be your friend. You don’t have to kill yourself cooking on top of all the running around and shuttling that you have to do. A slow cooker can help you set up a nutritious meal without having to spend hours slaving behind the steering wheel and over the stove.
Whether you’re a soccer mom, a football dad, or a volleyball grandparent, you know how important it is to show up for your kids’ games and sporting events.
Here are must pack items to bring along with you to sport events:
Water
I can’t say it enough: You’ve got to stay hydrated, no matter what you’re doing. Even if you think you’re just going to be sitting on the sidelines, remember that the sun can really sneak up on you and get you overheated.
And let’s face it—you aren’t just going to be sitting on the sidelines a lot. You’re going to be on your feet, running with the action, and yelling and cheering your kid on to victory.
Sporting event concession stands are notorious for being overpriced and full of unhealthy, sugary sodas and juices. Water will keep you hydrated during the games and keep your throat from drying out, so you can continue to yell your support. If your child runs off from the sidelines to join you, they’re also going to need plenty of water as well.
If you haven’t been to a sporting event for kids in a while, let’s cue you in on one big tip. Chances are the field will NOT have any kind of bleacher seats for you to use, and if they do, the seats are going to be hard metal that will kill your back.
Go ahead and head this off with some comfy captain’s chairs so you can sit in style. I personally like the type that folds up into the easy-to-carry bags and comes with a cupholder for your bottled water.
Shade
Soccer, baseball, and other outdoor sports can be brutal underneath the spring-time sun. You’re absolutely going to need shade to keep from roasting.
An absolute must-have is sunscreen. SPF 30 sunscreen will block 97% of the sun’s rays and SPF 50 will take that up just a notch to 98%.
Besides the sunscreen to ward off burns and potential skin cancer, stay safe while outdoors by also bringing an umbrella. (It can double to block out the sun but also to be on hand for any random thunderstorms.) A big floppy hat and a nice pair of sunglasses will round out your ensemble and keep you comfy during the game.
Getting ready for a kids’ sporting event should not require all the packing and preparation as if you’re getting ready to storm the beach at Normandy. But it does require some preparation so that you can be comfortable and safe during the game.
Struggle with staying on top of your bills and budgeting?
Do you stress out and dread when the 1st of the month rolls around?
Tired of living paycheck to paycheck?
Have constant arguments with your spouse around the family finances?
Have no clue on how to even get in control of your financial life?
Download this FREE Monthly Budgeting Action Plan, which includes Worksheets with step by step instructions on guiding you exactly on what you need to do to set up your own family budgeting plan that works for you and your family.
Struggle with staying on top of your bills and budgeting?
Do you stress out and dread when the 1st of the month rolls around?
Tired of living paycheck to paycheck?
Have constant arguments with your spouse around the family finances?
Have no clue on how to even get in control of your financial life?
Download this FREE Monthly Budgeting Action Plan, which includes Worksheets with step by step instructions on guiding you exactly on what you need to do to set up your own family budgeting plan that works for you and your family.
Do you struggle with getting your kids to clean up their room?
Are you ready for your kids to be more responsible?
Would you like your kids to be able to manage their time better?
Ready for a simple way to teach your kids good money management habits?
Download this FREE Family Chore and Money System Action Guide. It includes worksheets with step by step instructions on guiding you exactly what you need to do to set up your own chore, schedule and money management plans.
